• The Other Me

    The Other Me

    ‘Pharmaceutical Daze’ ii. Life became restructured, but restructured in a safe environment. I disappeared from the social circles I’d known. Later, I learned people had wondered what happened to me. I let the medications stabilise my life, although often it didn’t feel much different from before. When I eventually began going out again, Stan and I hung around with my cousin, Roo, and his friends. They were drinkers, and some of them occasional stoners. Stan joined them, although I didn’t. With what was going through my head, taking anything that changed my perceptions seemed redundant. It also scared me that some people could have extreme (paranoid) reactions to dope. I…

  • The Other Me

    The Other Me

    ‘Pharmaceutical Daze’ i. Once I took an Ativan, everything grew still. Peacefulness swept over me. There was no anxiety, no unease of any kind; there was only a relaxation that was euphoric. The Rohypnol was different. When I took one at night, my whole body buzzed, like a bee was zipping around inside my head. Luckily, I was soon asleep, so I didn’t have to put up with the sensation for long. As for the Sinequan, I started with two a night. A month later, that was increased to three. Another month later, it was one in the morning, and three at night. But if they were making me feel…