Contemporaneous: Chapters 31 – 32
31. Now that Lana is staying over Sunday unfolds differently, as I wake earlier, then make us breakfast, and we sit together and watch one of the morning breakfast shows. She asks me what I’ve got on for the day, and I tell her my Sunday usuals, such as washing and shopping. I can hear her thinking, wanting to do something together, and sure enough she suggests an afternoon walk to Peggy’s, a café that’s reached through a rural thirty-minute walk down by murky river or other. So that’s the day set. After I see her out for the morning, I shower, throw all my stuff into the washing machine,…
Contemporaneous: Chapters’ 4 & 5
4. This is too much too soon. It’s terrible structure. If I was editing this, I’d say there’s too much negative focus on Lana, and not enough of whatever the relationship was before. There’s no balance. It needs balance to introduce the characters and my world, although there’s no real plot – there is, sorta, in my head, although I don’t know how well it’ll be realised until my death, but more of that later, too. The morning’s a simple routine: some stretches trying to get flexibility back into my neck and back, play my shots in Words with Friends (a Scrabble knockoff) as I brush my teeth, shower, and…
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